I was looking through my old passports and memories came flooding in and before I could register my emotions, tears formed in my eyes. I gasped and chuckled and muttered to myself,

“Ezinne, you are so strong.”

The times I would over conceal my brows and wear tons of red lipstick.

I would wear a black choker and make ponytails with my weave on.

I would walk long miles, ride on risky bikes, and jump buses like it was nothing.

I was out of that house and that was all that mattered.

Teenage Ezinne 👇🏼

I was safe. Or so i thought.

But looking back at those photos just reminded me of where I am coming from and that was such a scary place. I have no idea how I managed to make it through. I have no clue.

Like I was deep in the trenches in and out of my mind, surrounded by trenches.

But somehow I’m here now, in a completely different world I walked myself to. I literally took a terrifying journey to get here, there were manageable moments, but it was agonizing.

Now I realize I somehow grew numb overtime and dropped dead weight so I could keep walking. There is never really a right time. Just time, and what you do with it.

It’s a miracle of grace that I am where I am, not just in trajectory but in mindset.

There is a clear transformation in my life done by Abba Father, and his process is mysterious, his Word is in the Secret Place.

Me now, basking in the breeze 🤎

His gaze has set me free. His love has no barriers or conditions. Even though I go through the deepest darkness, He is with me.

Often, we as Christians tend to overtly criticize ourselves every time we back slide into sin. We think we are now enemies of Christ. But that is just a lie that the devil tries to plant in our minds.

God is my Father, Jesus is my Brother and Friend. They are my family. So it doesn’t matter where I go or what I do, Their love burns eternal.

I will keep rising because I am not a loser. As long as He has my back, I will be all right.